


Quiet When I'm Coming Home

by MadGirl_SpaceGirl_StarGirl



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Auntie Nebula is a cute little killer, Aunty Romanoff is a badass, Bucky would make a good dad, F/F, F/M, Father/Daughter Relationship, Hydra can go to hell, I live for the comic relationship between WS and BW, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, JAMES BARNES SHOULD BE HAPPY GODDAMIT, Kidnapping, M/M, Multi, Possible smut if I can get over being an awkward dumbass, Violence, Wanda Maximoff Needs a Hug, but i'm gonna make him suffer first obvs, descriptions of rape, descriptions of violence, hostage, i never know what to tag, mother daughter relationship, so goddamit i'm including some in here, spys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:28:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24669895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadGirl_SpaceGirl_StarGirl/pseuds/MadGirl_SpaceGirl_StarGirl
Summary: Bucky Barnes is no stranger to nightmares.But this one is pulling him apart and he can't even remember it.With help from Steve, Natasha and Wanda he starts to pull the pieces together and this leads into a spiral of Hydra induced chaos.All he can remember is this;A voice.A girl.And a baby.(crappy summary story is way better I promise)
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes & Eleven | Jane Hopper, James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s), Sam Wilson/Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark/Pepper Potts
Comments: 3
Kudos: 62





	1. Chapter 1

James ‘Bucky’ Barnes was tired.

Forget that.

He was fucking exhausted.

The serum boosted his ability to function to an extent, but he hadn’t slept for more than twenty minutes a night for the last eleven days.

It was obvious that Steve was worried about him.

Sam was worried about him.

Even Natalia – shit – Natasha, she went by Natasha now, even Natasha seemed concerned.

In her own way.

If he was honest with himself, even Bucky was worried.

It was an ex-occupational hazard that he suffered from brutally vivid dreams. Nightmares.

However, the ones currently keeping him awake were… different.

But whenever he woke, gasping, drenched in sweat and stifling yells, almost everything drifted away before he could cling to it.

He had begrudgingly given tiny snippets of information to Steve, as his best friend wouldn’t let up until Bucky told him at least some of what was wrong. He regretted it when, later that day, he heard Steve talking to Natali – Natasha.

_“I know T’Challa was successful with the programming and when I say T’Challa, I mean Shuri. But have we even considered the possibility that his brain or at least his memory may have suffered permanent damage?”  
_Natasha had suggested quietly and since then Bucky could not stop thinking about that possibility.

Yes, he was free of the Hydra programming. Those goddamn words would never make him hurt someone ever again.

But the Wakandan princess who had undoubtedly saved his life and countless others by removing his Winter Soldier triggers, had by no means fixed him.

Huge sections of his memory were shot to hell, half his life a mystery that he was only just starting to allow Steve to help solve.

PTSD wasn’t a thing during the wars, at least not that he could remember, but the internet was both a blessing and a curse. Bucky had been reading it a lot, trying to learn, trying to catch up, just trying to sort out the mess that Hydra had left in his head.

So maybe his mind, his memory… maybe it was damaged beyond repair.

Maybe that was why, whatever the hell kind of dreams were keeping him from sleep, seemed to slip away like sand through his fingers whenever he tried to hold onto them.

_Pieces, fragments would catch in the mesh._

_A hand clinging to and clawing to his metal arm._

_An unrecognisable voice saying his name “James…”._

_A tiny room._

_A tiny face._

That tiny face haunted Bucky.

When he awoke or before he even risked trying to sleep, the old soldier found himself silently praying

_“Please say that I didn’t kill her. Please tell me I didn’t kill a baby.”_

His only spark of hope was that the baby in his mind was alive and he had no memory of her dying at his hands.

This was hopefully a good sign.

Because he hadn’t lied to Stark. He really did remember them all.

It was the one area where his mind did not fail him.

* * *

“On your left.”

Steve looked up with a smile at those words as Sam Wilson flopped down onto the couch beside him.

“What took you so long?” the Captain said with a tired attempt at his usual easy banter with the Falcon.

“Hey kiss my ass Captain Steroids” Sam grinned, with no malice in his voice. Then the smile dropped. Sam fixed Steve with a calm but intent gaze and said

“What’s on your mind Cap?”

“Worried about Buck.” 

“You’re always worried about him.”

Steve sighed.

“Yeah. Yeah I am. But something’s going on with him. He’s not sleeping. He wont tell me, hell he wont even talk to Nat. I think it’s his memories but…” Steve ran a hand through his hair and shrugged helplessly “T’Challa and Shuri, they did everything they could. I don’t know what else there is to do.”

The two men sat in silence for a minute.

Then Sam spoke up.

“You know…” Sam said slowly “… Wanda is coming back to the compound this evening…”

Steve straightened a little at that.

Wanda had taken some time away, staying with Clint and his family since the events in Germany led to her incarceration on The Raft prison.

Poor kid needed a break.

In fact, Steve was surprised she hadn’t stayed away longer. The girl had lost her parents, then her brother and then her home. She had been targeted by the people behind the (thankfully abandoned) accords, attacked by friends and locked up in a straight jacket and shock collar.

So yeah.

The kid needed a break.

“I thought she was staying until the 9th?” Steve said and Sam shook his head.

“Spoke to her last week. Got the impression she’s worried about being a burden on Barton and his family.”

“Seriously? Barton loves her. And Laura is a saint, we all know that.”

“Yeah. I know. But like I said, she’s coming back this evening…”

Suddenly, what Sam was suggesting clicked in Steve’s brain.

“I don’t know Sam.” he said warily.

“Won’t know unless we try. You ask Barnes, I’ll talk to Wanda.”

With that, Sam clapped Steve on the shoulder, got to his feet and left the room.

* * *

“No.”

“Buck c’mon…”

“I said no Steve!”

This was going well.

Steve tried again.

“You were the one who told me you wanted to keep trying, trying to remember and fix things. Why not let Wanda try? You know her, you’ve fought with her and even if you don’t trust her – ”

“I don’t trust anyone who can or has controlled other people’s minds!”

“Even if you don’t trust her” Steve said calmly “I do. More than most.” He took a breath and walked towards where Bucky was stood, having turned his back to him.

“Look” he said “Buck I get it. But even you have to admit that something is off with you man. You’re struggling and everyone can see it. We tried T’Challa and Shuri. We haven’t tried Wanda. You two haven’t been in the same place since Germany but now is the time to try.”

He put a hand on Bucky’s shoulder and took it as a good sign that his best friend didn’t shrug him off.

“Just try.”

“I don’t wanna hurt her Steve.”

Bucky’s words were almost a whisper.

There was a knock at the open door to Bucky’s room.

“I don’t mean to interrupt…”

That accent could only belong to the subject of their discussion and both Steve and Bucky turned to find Wanda stood a little awkwardly in the doorway.

“Sam told me. About his idea I mean. I’ll do it… if – if you’ll let me, James?”

All eyes were on Bucky now.

His shoulders sagged a little.

“Can you? Fix it I mean?” he asked, hesitantly.

Wanda took a step into the room. She was wearing a long red cardigan and she twisted the sleeves as she replied

“Truthfully? I’m not sure. Not 100%. But most likely yes. To an extent. If there are memories, stuck below the surface, I’m good at getting those back. But it may take time… doing too much in one go could do more harm than good.”

Wanda gave Bucky a small half smile.

“I won’t do it unless you want me to James. And I’ll be careful. I promise.”

Maybe it was the accent.

Maybe he found the almost Eastern European lilt soothing after his time in Romania and his memories of Natalia.

Maybe it was because Wanda had risked everything in a fight she could have easily walked away from and had suffered for helping him and Steve.

But Bucky found himself taking a deep breath and nodding his head.

“Okay.”

They all jumped when suddenly someone clapped their hands and turned as Sam said

“Well then let’s do it.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A deep dive into some awful memories.

Bucky was nervous.

He was lying in the middle of his bed, with Wanda sat cross legged by his head.

Steve was in one corner and Sam was in the other both with their arms folded. It had been decided they should both stay

“Just in case” as Sam had said.

He didn’t know it, but Wanda was nervous too.

They had talked everything through, she knew what she was supposed to do, but she was still nervous. She did not want to mess this up and risk hurting Bucky.

After Wanda had said that trying to do too much would possibly cause more harm than good, she had asked what she should try reconstructing or retrieving first.

Before he could stop himself, Bucky had blurted out

“The baby.”

The others had all looked at him confused, even Steve, which was when Bucky remembered he hadn’t told that part to his friend.

As quickly and quietly as he could, Bucky explained about the fragments of dreamy memory, the hand, the voice, the baby’s face.

Then with a face of thunder and voice of stone Bucky looked Steve dead in the eye and said

“I need to know if I killed this baby Steve. I have to know.”

And here they were. Wanda looked down at Bucky and said in that softly accented voice of hers

“Are you ready?”

Not trusting himself to speak, Bucky nodded.

“It won’t be like reliving it yourself. It’ll be like you’re watching a film.” Wanda tried to assure him and Bucky snapped

“If you’re gonna do it, just do it.”

Wanda ducked her head and bit her lip and Bucky felt instantly guilty.

“Wanda” he said quietly “I’m sorry. I know you’re tryna help.”

“It’s okay.”

She smiled and placed her hands either side of his head, up near his temples.

“On three. One… two…”

And he fell into the darkness.

* * *

_He opened his eyes._

_He was in a corridor. There were bolted doors stretching as far as the eye could see and there was a set of stairs behind him._

_Everything was ever so slightly blurred, stretched at the edges._

_He heard footsteps and turned to look at a group of people striding down the corridor towards him._

_There he was._

_Surrounded on all sides by heavily armed guards, he was in full combat gear, mask included, though he was free of his goggles._

_But he wasn’t the Winter Soldier._

_Not completely anyway._

_There was the tiniest hint of defiance in the way that this old James Buchannan Barnes was walking._

_He was never any kind of rebellious when he was their soldier._

_But there was a vacancy he could see, a deadness behind the old James’s eyes that told him, while he may not have been ready to assassinate a few dozen people, he wasn’t ‘Bucky’ either, wasn’t in complete control of himself._

_He and the guards stopped outside one of the doors and a guard pulled out a heavy key, slid that into the lock and slid the bolt out of place, opening the cell like door._

_They all walked inside, Bucky following after them like a shadow._

_He needed to see._

_The room was empty._

_Just a chair and a narrow bed with a single white sheet over it._

_No baby._

_The old him, sat in the chair, hands behind his back._

_He was sure if he moved the guards would shoot him._

_So was Bucky._

_The guards filed out and a man Bucky recognised walked in._

_Steve had called him Rumlow._

_The James in the chair stared straight ahead as Rumlow, hand on his gun in its holster, stood before him._

_“You know what you gotta do.”_

_“Da.” James said and Bucky had to remind himself that he couldn’t strangle a memory as Rumlow smirked and sneered at the man in the chair_

_“Cheer up Barnes. You’re lucky. This one’s pretty. I’ve seen some ugly chicks got to the others.”_

_James didn’t react._

_Bucky suddenly felt incredibly sick._

_You can’t strangle a memory, you can’t strangle a memory._

_The door opened again._

_A raging, screaming, terrified ball of yellow dungarees and blonde hair was tossed into the room, landing hard on the floor._

_Rumlow bent down and unfastened the cuffs on the raging, screaming, terrified ball of yellow dungarees and blonde hair._

_“Have fun kids. Try not to break the bed.” Rumlow chuckled as he walked out of the room and locked the door behind him._

_The man in the chair stood up._

_Walked forwards._

_Reached down._

_No._

_No._

_No._

_No._

“NO! BUCK STOP! NO!”

That was Steve’s voice.

They were Steve’s hands and Sam’s grabbing him and pulling him, pulling him away from…

Wanda!

Bucky reeled backwards almost falling to the ground. Wanda did fall to the floor as Bucky finally released her throat from his metal hand, and she gasped for air.

Steve was torn between Bucky and Wanda but he didn’t have to make a decision.

Bucky had gone, disappearing from the room like a ghost.

Steve knew better than to go after him right now. 

When he turned back, Sam had already helped Wanda to her feet and had sat her on the edge of the bed.

Steve crouched in front of the young woman.

“Are you okay?” he asked, face full of concern.

Wanda nodded.

“It wasn’t his fault” she said in a pained, hoarse voice “I must’ve pushed too hard, I – ”

Steve shook his head.

“No, no don’t beat yourself up. It’s not your fault.” He said, putting his hand on her arm.

“I heard yelling.” Came Natasha Romanoff’s dry voice from behind them. Steve turned to see the redhead leaning against the wall with her arms folded.

“Sam, take Wanda to get checked out?”

“I’m fine…” Wanda started to protest but Sam put his foot down.

“I ain’t no doctor but you’re already startin’ to bruise. C’mon Maximoff. Don’t make me carry your skinny ass.”

Rolling her eyes, Wanda got to her feet and Sam helped her from the room.

That left Natasha and Steve.

“James?” Natasha asked and Steve put his head in his hands, nodding.

“She was trying to help him piece together something. It’s been driving him to the edge and then he just…”

“Tried to crush her windpipe? Wow. I’m sure I couldn’t possibly relate.” Natasha deadpanned and Steve almost laughed.

“You take Brooklyn. Check your old haunts. I’ll check his other spots.” Natasha said, squeezing Steve’s arm before marching from the room, her red braid swinging down her back.

“Yeah. Brooklyn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did Bucky see? Dun dun duuuuun  
> More drama to come.   
> Let me know what you think!  
> More soon.  
> Geronimo xx


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A couple of ex assassins have a heart to heart.   
> Trigger warning (scroll to the end notes to see more detail)

“Thought I might find you here.”

Bucky didn’t look up.

A pair of slender, black denim clad legs stopped in front of him.

“ _Ne vozrazhayesh', yesli ya sizhu_?” (Mind if I sit?)

“ _Konechno_ ” (Sure).

Bucky couldn’t bring himself to look at Natalia as she sat down on the bench beside him.

They both just sat in silence looking at the plaque on the tree next to them, listening to the sounds of the park.

THIS PLAQUE IS DEDICATED TO JAMES BUCHANNAN BARNES  
WHO GAVE HIS LIFE AS A HERO FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD  
BROOKLYN BOY DID GOOD.

Natasha smirked at that.

“I always thought that was the most informal plaque I had ever seen.” She said mildly.

“I researched it. Apparently, it was a group of kids I went to school with. Steve said they always called me and him ‘The Brooklyn Boys’ even though we were all Brooklyn kids. I don’t remember why.”

Bucky sounded worse than miserable.

He sounded like someone had ripped his heart out and stomped on it.

“You look tired _moya lyubov'_ ” Natasha said and Bucky almost, almost smiled.

“You haven’t called me that in a long time.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t think you would remember. Any of it.”

“I never forgot you. Your face at least. I recognised you back in Washington, as soon as I saw you. I just didn’t know who you were. It came back while I was in Wakanda. The Red Room. Training. You, _Natalia_.”

There was a silence after Bucky spoke those words.

Natasha was processing and Bucky was wondering if he should have kept his mouth shut.

“I wish you had told me.”

Bucky made a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat and they lapsed back into quiet.

.

.

.

“Is Wanda okay?” Bucky’s voice was barely audible and full of anguish.

“Wanda’s a tough girl. She’ll be fine. First words out of her mouth were that it wasn’t your fault. And she’s right?”

Natasha turned so that she was sat side on, facing the man beside her and put her hand on his leg, a gesture that, although Bucky tensed at first, relaxed him a little with good memories.

“What happened? I haven’t seen you like that since Berlin.”

“She was trying to help me… piece some things together.”

“Memory retrieval?”

Bucky nodded.

“Just one thing to start. She said doing more might hurt more than help.”

“What was she trying to repair?”

Bucky leant back on the bench rubbing his hands together, flesh leaving condensation on the metal in the cold New York air.

“I… I haven’t been sleeping. I keep having this dream… nightmare really. But I couldn’t remember it when I woke up, just – just pieces.”

“And Wanda was trying to put it all together?”

A nod.

“Did she?”

Another nod.

“James” Natasha’s voice was firm, but not unkind “James, what did you see?”

She took his hand, or more accurately, she placed her hand atop his flesh one.

“Tell what you saw James. I can’t help if I don’t know.”

Bucky was clenching his metal hand so hard that Natasha could’ve sworn she heard the metal creak in protest.

“I – can’t” He was so tense and strained that his words were almost fractured “Natalia, I _can’t_ …”

Natasha turned his hand over and held his in both of hers.

“You’re not going to scare me. You and me? To the rest of the world we’re monsters. But we have to know better. We’ve got red in our ledgers but that is not who we are. You see me. You’ve always seen _me_. And I know you. You are not what they made you.”

There were unshed tears shining in Bucky’s eyes as he instinctively leaned towards Natasha.

“Talk to me _moya lyubov'_ ” Natasha murmured.

They stayed close for a moment.

Bucky pulled back first.

“There was a girl…”

Natasha stayed where she was and let Bucky talk at his own speed. And she didn’t let go of his hand.

“They didn’t tell me why. They just said I had to do it. I wasn’t… I wasn’t in control but I… I still did it. She was young as well, too young, just a kid and I – God _Natalia_ I – I raped her.”

Bucky practically choked on the R word and a single tear fell from his left eye.

“I remember now. She was fighting and begging but… but I did it anyway.”

Natasha shook her head firmly.

“No. No they did that. Hydra did that to both of you. It’s not your fault – hey…” Natasha used her right hand to cup Bucky’s cheek and turn his face back towards her.  
“Hey… it’s not your fault.”

Bucky wiped furiously at his eyes.

“I’m not sure she saw it like that.”

Natasha paused and thought for a moment.

“Do you know what happened to her? The girl – what was her name?”

Bucky thought hard for a moment, his face creased in a frown of concentration.

“She said…”

A flash of the memory crossed his mind and he visibly flinched

_“My name’s Georgia, Georgia Hanson, my Nana calls me Gee – please, please don’t! No please! My name’s Georgia you don’t have to do this please!”_

“She said her name was Georgia. Georgia Hanson. She’s probably dead.” He said flatly pulling his hand and face away from Natasha.

“Did you…”

“I didn’t kill her. But if Hydra had her, odds are she’s dead.”

Natasha frowned.

No, she thought, that doesn’t add up… something doesn’t make sense about this…

The Black Widow got to her feet.

“Come on” she said “ _odinoko na morose.”_ (It’s lonely out in the cold.) She extended her hand and waited until he took it and stood beside her. “Let’s go home.”

As they began to walk out of the park, a thought struck Bucky and Natasha felt the shift in his body once again.

“What is it?”

Bucky frowned.

“I still don’t remember the baby…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING - mentions of rape and possible underage.   
> What do you think?  
> I live for Bucky and Nat content be it romantic or not.   
> Let me know what you think :)   
> More soon.   
> Geronimo xx


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha is being sneaky.  
> Bucky is hiding.  
> And a visitor arrives to shake things up again.

If Steve hadn’t been worried before, he sure as hell was now.

After he had returned to the compound with Natasha, Bucky had apologised to Wanda and then disappeared into his room.

He hadn’t been seen in days.

Steve knew that Bucky was coming out to their kitchen for food whenever he was out, because there would be freshly cleaned dishes in the drying rack when he returned, but apart from that, Bucky hadn’t come out of his room for over 72 hours.

Steve was at a loss as to how to help his friend.

Natasha had told him the barest minimum of what Bucky had told her, and Steve had pieced the rest together himself.

He was horrified, it was true, but he knew his friend was not to blame.

Hydra really had destroyed Bucky Barnes.

Sam was reluctant to pose anymore ideas after his last one nearly ended with Wanda getting her neck snapped.

Natasha… Natasha was behaving more like the old Natasha.

She was aloof, slightly more withdrawn from the team than usual, and she had a semi-permanent, small, crinkled frown between her eyebrows.

Steve had the sneaking suspicion that she was more invested in the Bucky situation than she was letting on. He was sure that the woman was up to something.  
Several times, he had walked in on her tapping away at her laptop or talking quietly on the phone in a variety of languages that he didn’t recognise.

It would be exactly nine days before Steve found out that he was right.

* * *

“You’ve been hiding.”

Bucky didn’t stop his rapid press ups as he heard Natalia’s words.

“Not hiding… better… safer…” he muttered eyes glued to the floor as he continued to work out, like he was trying to ignore her presence.

“Almost a hundred years on this earth and twenty years since the Red Room and you’re still a terrible liar _moya lyubov'.”_

With an exhale through his teeth that sounded like a hiss, Bucky halted his push ups and sat back on his knees, looking up at the Black Widow.

Natasha half smiled half smirked.

“Well this brings back memories.” She drawled, her tone teasing “Always did like you on your knees.”

Even Bucky couldn’t stop a small smile flashing across his face at that, as he got to his feet and pulled on a shirt that was lying on his bed.

“Stop it.” He said, the quick little smile feeling foreign to him, but good at the same time.

“ _ty lyubish' eto_.” (You love it) grinned Natasha, before a more business like expression came onto her face.

“Take a shower and come downstairs. You’ve got a visitor.”

And then she walked out of the room.

Bucky watched her go.

A visitor.

Who would want to visit him? His only friends lived in the compound.

Shuri.

He remembered that the Wakandan princess had promised to come to the compound, check in from time to time to see how he was doing and if there was anything else that could be done to… fix him.

Shuri wasn’t so bad. She like Natalia didn’t treat him like a hand grenade with the pin pulled.

Even if they probably should some of the time.

The warrior – genius – sharp as a tack – princess had even pulled a few laughs out of him, during his time in Wakanda.

Okay.

He could handle a visit from Shuri.

Bucky showered and dressed, pulling on a hoodie as he walked out of his quarters.

He headed past Steve’s room, down the nearest staircase to the large kitchen diner/living room two floor down. He walked in, expecting to see Shuri waiting for him, her confident smile plastered on her face but…

But there was no Shuri.

Just Natalia.

And someone who had their back turned to the door, until he entered the room, when they turned and – And Bucky froze.

Because she didn’t have blonde hair anymore.

And she wasn’t wearing yellow dungarees.

But he knew that face.

It had been haunting him for days.

“What the hell is this Natalia?”

* * *

_Seven hours earlier_

Natasha knew she had the right apartment the minute she got to the door.

There were tell tale signs that someone had installed at least three extra locks, possibly more.

Natasha, knocked, three times, the leather gloves on her hands slightly muffling the sharp sound of the impact of her fist against the wood.

Chicago in December, required gloves.

Bucky heard soft footsteps come to the other side of the door and could practically sense someone looking at her through the peephole.

“Whatever you’re selling, I don’t want it!” a female voice said from inside the apartment.

“Miss Hanson? Georgia Hanson?”

A pause.

“What do you want?”

“Can you open the door?”

Another pause, shorter this time. 

“No. Go away.”

“Georgia my name is Natasha Romanoff. I’m a friend of James Barnes?”

Natasha waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And then there was the sound of one, two, three, four locks and a deadbolt being unfastened.

Then the door creaked open, only an inch, enough that Natasha could see a sliver of a pale face, a dark blue eye and some wisps of dark brown hair.

“James? He’s alive?”

Natasha nodded.

“I’m his friend. He told me about you. He remembers what happened now.”

“How did you find me?”

“I’m good at finding people who don’t want to be found. It used to be my job.”

“Does anybody else – ”

“I’m alone. James doesn’t even know I’m here. Can we talk?”

The face in the doorway hesitated. Natasha gently put a hand on the door and smiled as kindly as she could.

“Georgia, I know you’re scared. But I’m here as a friend. I need to speak to you. How about you listen to what I need to say and then if you want you can throw me out and I’ll never come back and no one will ever know that I was here? I promise.”

Natasha waited for a long moment before the girl the other side of the door pulled it open.

“Come in.”

Natasha walked inside.

The apartment was tiny, and dark. The blinds over the one window were lifted less than an inch and there was a single lamp in the corner, it’s light casting odd shadows on the walls.

Georgia Hanson walked into the room that seemed to be serving as both living room, bedroom and dining room and then turned to face Natasha.

Natasha, her training being something she couldn’t always stop, did a flashpoint assessment of the girl.

Bucky had briefly described Georgia to her and she’d gotten the rest of the details from Wanda and; eventually she had found the girl’s school records and the photo from the missing person’s report filed by her grandmother.

The little, blonde, smiling Georgia from her school photos, had grown into a dark-haired waif of young woman with dark circles under her eyes and an untrusting face.

The mistrust was only natural, Natasha supposed, after what she had been through.

“You drink tea?” The question surprised Natasha but she nodded and said

“Strong as you can, three sugars please.”

Georgia walked into the tiny kitchen and Natasha heard the click and whistle of a kettle starting to boil.

She took the liberty of sitting on the patched couch, crossing her legs and waiting patiently for Georgia to reappear.

The younger woman did so, carry two chipped mugs. Wordlessly she handed one to Natasha and then sat with her legs crossed underneath her.

Natasha took a sip of her tea and then rested the cup against her knee.

“James didn’t think you were still alive. He’ll be glad you are.”

Georgia didn’t smile.

“He’s had ten years to worry about if I’m dead or not. Why now?”

* * *

“What the hell is this Natalia?”

“James, this is Georg – ”

“I know who it is! What – how – ” Bucky didn’t know if he was shocked, angry, relieved or afraid. He swallowed and then said in a cracked voice

“I thought you were dead.”

“I thought you were.”

There was a silence.

“I’m sorry” Bucky said quietly, unable to meet her eyes “I’m so… I’m so sorry.”

“Why?” Georgia’s voice was surprisingly calm with only the slightest tremble to it. “Because we both got forced into something neither of us wanted?”

“Because – ”

“You never hurt me James. Even when you weren’t you, you never hurt me.”

Bucky couldn’t speak. Georgia, who hadn’t said two words on the journey to the compound, had seemingly found her voice.

The blockade that had been built over the last ten years had broken and the flood had begun.

“I tried hating you. I did. I _wanted_ to hate you, but even I knew that you didn’t have a choice, just like me. Even dumb, stupid little kid me could see it wasn’t your fault.”

Bucky grimaced and muttered

“I should have fought harder. Tried to stop – ”

“What would that have done? Got you hurt. Got me thrown to someone who _would_ hurt me. The man, Rumlow I think, he made it pretty clear what would happen if it wasn’t you.”

At Rumlow’s name, Bucky felt a murderous rage flash through him, before he calmed himself by thinking “ _You can’t kill a dead man_.”

Georgia looked surprised.

“He’s dead? Huh. Good.”

Bucky finally looked up, confused and suspicious.

“How did you…”

Natasha now spoke up.

“Georgia has some… abilities. Low level telepathy and some telekinesis. Her and Wanda could practically be twins.”

Bucky didn’t smile at the joke.

“That’s why they put us together I guess. The super soldier and the freak. What a wonderful pair of genetics to mix.” The pained and angry sarcasm in Georgia’s voice hurt Bucky’s heart but her words alarmed him more.

“What?” he said lowly.

Something about the tone of his voice seemed to spook Georgia because she took several steps back and closed her mouth, folding her arms around her middle like she was shielding herself and fiddling with the sleeves of her grey sweater.

“Georgia” Bucky didn’t want to scare the girl, but he couldn’t stop himself taking some imploring steps forwards “Georgia what do you mean ‘mix together’?”

Natasha stepped in between them, directly into Bucky’s eyeline, but not before he saw Georgia turn away from him, her lip between her teeth and tears shining in her eyes.

“Sit down _moya lyubov'_. Before you fall down. You and Georgia have a lot to talk about.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think y'all know what I'm building to.  
> I'm having such a good time writing this but holy heck is it challenging.  
> Let me know what you think!  
> More soon.  
> Geronimo xx


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky takes off.  
> Again.   
> Sam is made a babysitter.   
> And something you've all probably guessed is officially revealed.

“James?”

Falling.

“James?”

It felt like he was falling.

“ _moya lyubov'_?”

Bucky blinked.

He swallowed.

And then in as hoarse a voice as he had ever spoken in, managed to rasp out the words

“I… I remember.”

* * *

**Georgia’s Apartment…**

As Georgia took their mugs back into the tiny kitchen and began to make another cup of tea, Natasha got to her feet and looked around the cramped apartment.

As they drank their first cup of tea, they had skated over the details of what Hydra had made Bucky do to the girl.

It became clear that Georgia was angry.

Angry, sad and in pain.

But none of that seemed to be directed at Bucky.

It was all aimed at Hydra.

And herself.

Something on the rickety fold up table in the corner caught Natasha’s eyes. Walking over, the Black Widow picked up a brown paper file. It was a Private Investigators report. Several of them actully. As she read, Natasha felt her eyes narrow.

“Georgia…”

* * *

Bucky blinked.

He swallowed.

And then in as hoarse a voice as he had ever spoken in, managed to rasp out the words

“I… I remember.”

* * *

**11 years earlier…**

_The soldier had his orders._

_He was to visit the girl again._

_But not like normal._

_This time was different._

_Somewhere, in a tiny untouched space in the back of the soldiers mind, the old man was screaming._

**_“Leave her! Leave her alone!”_ **

_But the soldier had his orders._

_He marched down the corridor, following the man who liked to hit him, her anyone._

_They reached the cell door._

_“Go get em lover boy!” The man said with an unpleasant smile, pushing the door open._

_The soldier walked inside._

_There she was._

_Her blonde hair hung limply down her back now and the yellow dungarees were long gone._

_Somewhere outside of the soldiers control, he saw how tired she looked, how drained and pale._

_She looked up at him and the soldier could have sworn she almost smiled._

_That almost smiled faded however when she realised that this was the pure soldier, with no glimpse of the man she had come to know in stolen moments._

_This made her clutch the blankets in her arms tighter and his eyes travelled down to the snuffling bundle._

_Their was the target of his orders._

_The old man was screaming in the back of his mind again._

“ ** _Don’t touch them! DON’T TOUCH MY GIRLS!_** ”

_But the soldier had his orders._

_He strode forwards. With one hand he shoved the girl back onto the bed holding her still. With his other hand he took the bundle._

_“No! No! James! James please! Wake up! Don’t take her, please, please, don’t take her! James wake up!”_

_She was crying._

_Screaming for James._

_He was not James._

_He was a soldier with orders._

_He ripped the now wailing bundle away from the girl._

_He turned to the door._

_She lunged for his back, but he threw him away from his body with one hand, not turning back as he heard her crash to the floor._

_She was crying._

_The bundle was crying._

_Wailing and wailing and wailing and wailing and wailing and –_

“BUCKY!”

* * *

Steve and Sam were sparring when Natasha came bursting into the room.

“Ever heard of knocking Roman – ” Sam started to quip, but Natasha cut him off addressing Steve.

“Barnes took off again. I think I know where he’s gone but I might need some backup on this one. It’s bad.”

“How bad?”

“I’ll explain on the way. You’ve got five minutes, I’ll meet you out front. Sam, think you can do some babysitting for me?”

* * *

“Hi.”

Georgia jumped and span around, her short dark curls smacking her in the face a little.

A tall black man was stood behind her, clearly having just walked through the door.

“You’re Sam Wilson.”

“And you’re Georgia.”

There was a pause.

“Natasha said you might need some company… till they find Barnes?”

Georgia’s mouth twitched like she wanted to smile.

“I’m twenty six Mr Wilson, I think I can manage without a babysitter.”

Sam chuckled.

“Who said anything about babysitting?”

Now Georgia did smile.

“Miss Romanoff did. I can hear you thinking about it.” 

Sam laughed again, holding his hands up in surrender.

“Okay you got me. How bout I get by without lying and you get along without reading my mind. Sound okay?”

Georgia shrugged clearly a little embarrassed.

“I’ll try. I can’t just turn it off and on though. Sorry.”

Sam waved the apology away with a smile.

“I live with Wanda Maximoff, I can deal.”

Babysitter or not Sam was doing an excellent job of putting Georgia at ease.

Though she was still twisting her sweater sleeves between her fingers, she managed another smile and then a slightly awkward silence fell.

“So are we gonna stand around here all day or are we gonna sit so you can spill all the gory details bout you and Barnes?” Sam said and Georgia shifted a little.

“That’s a lot of gore Mr Wilson.” She said carefully, sitting down on one of the couches, folding her legs up underneath her.

“It’s Sam. Mr Wilson was my Pops.” Sam sat down too, leaning back in comfort. “I was just kidding by the way. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want too. Don’t have to talk to me at all if you don’t want too. If it helps, just stick the TV on and pretend I’m not even here.”

“My Nana would kill me if I just ignored someone like that. She was all about manners.”

“Well how about I put a film on and I ignore you instead? Then you’re Gran can kick my ass instead.”

“Sounds fair.”

Chuckling to himself, Sam switched the television on and flipped through the channels until he found The Blind Side.

The silence that fell as they watched the film was far more comfortable.

Georgia took the time to surreptitiously survey Sam Wilson.

Of course, Sam knew she was doing it, but pretended like he hadn’t noticed.

She decided he had a kind face. She wouldn’t mess with him that’s for sure, but his face was kind and more than a little handsome.

They were about twenty minutes into the film when Sam spoke up, his voice casual but sincere.

“You know Barnes might be a miserable asshole, but he’s a good man.”

“I know he is.”

Sam raised and eyebrow.

“You know what? That he’s a miserable asshole or he’s a good man?”

Georgia couldn’t stop a laugh escaping.

“I know he’s a good man. I haven’t talked to the real him long enough to meet the miserable asshole yet.”

“Trust me. It wont take long.”

Georgia sighed.

“We’ll see. Ten years is a long time. And he can’t even look at me.”

* * *

“Barnes!”

“Leave me alone Natalia.”

“James Buchanan Barnes so help me if you walk away from me one more time I’m going to make the Red Room look like a picnic!”

Bucky stopped walking down the alley and turned to face the Black Widow.

“What do you want from me?”

“I want you to stop. And think.”

“About what? That all this shit just got a hundred times worse?!”

“Worse? What the hell are you talking about?”

“I… she was…I…we have…”

Bucky’s worse were stammering, mixing together and coming out jumbled as his breathing grew faster and shallower.

Natasha recognised the signs.

“James… James breath. Come on… _moya lyubov' tebe nuzhno dyshat' ... medlenno ... medlenno…_ that’s it… breath slow.”   
_(my love you need to breath... slowly... slowly)_

Bucky did his best to listen to the red head. He slowed his breathing as best he could, but then it seemed like everything hit him at once and he physically staggered, leaning heavily against the brick wall of the alley.

At once, Natasha was in front of him.

She placed her palms flat on his chest, feeling him breath.

“Slowly…” she all but crooned.

The contact was too soft. Too much.

“Natalia…” he said hoarsely and his voice broke. Natasha didn’t hesitate before she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug. Bucky buried his face in her shoulder.

He wasn’t crying.

He just… wanted to be close.

And breath.

“It’s okay… it’s okay…”

“Don’t…” he mumbled into her jacket “Don’t tell Steve.”

“I wont. Not till your ready. I knew where you’d be. So I sent him to the other side of the city. But moya lyubov'…”

Natasha pulled back slightly and tilted his face to look at her.

“You’re a father James. You have a little girl out there somewhere.”

Bucky looked heart broken as he said in a barely controlled voice.

“Yeah. And I ripped her out of her own mothers arms. Gave her to them.”

Natasha grip on Bucky’s face became firmer and she glared fiercely at him.

“You didn’t do shit James. The soldier did it. For Hydra. Are you the soldier? Are you?!” she barked the last words and James jerked his head non comitally.

“No you are not. You are not what they made you. Look at me.” Her voice was not angry but it was hard as iron as she said

“They stole your life. They made you hurt that girl back there. They took your daughter.”

Bucky met her gaze and saw the Widow in her eyes as she asked him,

“So what are you going to do about it?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ta da!  
> Bucky is a daddy!  
> But where's baby Barnes? Well, she wont be a baby anymore.   
> Like Georgia said; ten years is a long time.  
> So, Natasha asked the question, now I'm asking you:  
> What is Bucky gonna do about it?  
> Let me know what you think, I'd love to hear if you're enjoying it and what you might like to see!  
> More soon.   
> Geronimo xx


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The past is revealed.   
> Well some of it.   
> Secrets are told.  
> Well a few.   
> And a genius billionaire playboy philanthropist shows up.

For the first time in a long time, Georgia Hanson found herself relaxing.

She still had a hundred things whirring around in her brain but hanging out with Sam had calmed her.

He had barely spoken to her.

Which had actually helped. She felt no pressure to tell him anything.

They just sat and watched the last third of The Blind Side, then half a Family Guy episode and had just started The Force Awakens when they heard the door open behind them.

Sam and Georgia turned to see a slightly haggard looking Bucky walking in, with Natasha in front of him and Steve behind.

Georgia quickly got to her feet, her hands back to twisting and picking at her sweater sleeves.

“Are you okay?” she blurted out, looking anxiously at Bucky who nodded once.

“Why don’t we all sit down?” Natasha said, steering Bucky like a child to the empty couch out of the three. Steve took a step forwards and extended a hand towards Georgia.

“Steve Rogers.” He said with a kind smile, which Georgia hesitantly returned.

“Georgia. You’re Captain America right?”

“Yes Ma’am.”

Georgia retreated to her solitary couch and Steve sat beside Sam. The Falcon looked from Bucky to Georgia and said to the latter,

“I’m not exactly privy to all this. You want me to go?”

Georgia hesitated. She was unsure but then she noticed how Bucky had tensed when Sam had spoken about leaving.

“No. You can stay. If it’s okay with James?”

Bucky nodded his head once.

An awkward silence fell before Sam said

“So… someone wanna fill me in?”

Georgia, Bucky and Steve all looked to Natasha, who refrained from rolling her eyes and started to explain to Sam all that had been discovered and the whole ‘situation’.

As Miss Romanoff talked, Georgia couldn’t help but watch James from across the couches.

God.

It should scare her that he hadn’t changed.

Almost 11 years on and he looked the same. She supposed she shouldn’t have been surprised. She had googled him when she’d started to make an attempt at reclaiming whatever life she had left. James Barnes had barely changed in appearance in almost ninety years.

But that wasn’t true, not exactly.

He looked more tired than he had when she was a teenager. The dark circles on his face were just that little bit darker.

His eyes looked older.

“Georgia?”

“Hmm?”

Georgia blinked to realise that everyone was looking at her.

“You hired a P.I. A few right?” Steve said, a small crease in his forehead.

“Yes.”

“Did they find anything?”

Georgia almost scoffed.

“I spent almost everything I had trying to find her. The first guy was a sleaze. Second one was a crook, ran off with my money. Miss Jones was the best, but the most she could find was a name; Dr Brenner.”

Georgia sniffed as her eyes started to glisten a little.

“Miss Jones… Jessica she did everything she could. And I looked, I went to everyone I could with Brenner’s name, but… but it’s like she just disappeared. I never gave up, but – but I ran out of money and things got bad and it was like… it was like Jane was just… gone.”

“Jane?”

Now everyone’s eyes looked to Bucky, who was the one who had said the name, in a low voice.

“That’s… it’s what I called her.” A single tear slipped over Georgia’s lid. “Jane Ellis Hanson. Ellis was my Grampa’s name. Jane was for my Nana.”

For a second it looked like Georgia was going to say something else, but then Sam spoke up.

“Did that P.I – Jones – Did she tell you that Doctor’s first name?”

“Martin. Dr Martin Brenner.”

Sam frowned. Natasha frowned in turn.

“What?” She asked.

“That name. I heard it when I was still serving. Can’t remember exactly what it was… I _think_ he’s an intelligence and weapons guy. I never met him but the name just sounds familiar.”

“CIA? Or NSA?” Natasha asked and Georgia spoke up, surprising everyone with her words.

“He works for the Department of Energy.”

There was a moments silence as everyone processed this.

“Georgia, I thought you said that they’d disappeared?” Steve said, the crease between his brow deepening.

Georgia shook her head.

“I said it was like she – Jane – had disappeared. I found Brenner six months after Jessica gave me his name.”

Natasha cocked her head to the side.

“Georgia. You need to talk to us. You need to tell us everything.”

Georgia swallowed, a muscle in her jaw jumping and she had practically picked a hole in her sweater sleeve.

She was afraid.

And everyone could see it.

“I uh… Jessica helped me track Brenner to DC, in 2014. I tried, I tried everything, I tried to meet him face to face, when that didn’t work I went to the police but no one believed me and then – ”

Georgia took a moment, her breath quickening as she continued.

“I started seeing people. Men, at my apartment, at my job, following me in the street. I start getting calls. Sometimes it was breathing down the line, sometimes it was just silence and then they’d hang up. Then I tried to go straight to the head of the Department of Energy… it didn’t work anyway, but when I came home… my apartment had been trashed.”

Bucky, Steve and Sam all visibly tensed with a combination of concern and anger.

Only Natasha remained unreadable.

“They must have been watching. Because I got a call two minutes after I walked in the door.”

Georgia bit her lip as she recounted the story.

“Four words. ‘She’s gone. We’re watching.’” She shrugged helplessly “I was out of options. And I was scared as hell. I grabbed a bag and ran. Didn’t stop till I hit New Orleans.”

Georgia looked tearfully at Bucky.

“I – I’m so, so sorry James. I couldn’t find her, I don’t know – don’t know – wh – where she is, if she’s alive, I tried, I – ”

To everyone’s surprise (including a little bit of her own) Natasha moved first. She reached out and took both of Georgia’s hands in her left and tilted her chin with her right until the younger woman was looking her full in the face.

“If she is alive, I will find her.” Natasha said with as much severity and seriousness as Steve had ever heard in her voice. “ _We_ will find her.”

“Hell yeah we will.” Sam agreed and Steve nodded his head and said “Absolutely.”

Only Bucky stayed silent.

“We will find her” Natasha continued “And we will protect you both.”

Feeling like a child as she said it but unable to stop herself, Georgia said softly

“You promise?”

“Of course she promises” a voice said, a voice familiar to everyone even Georgia. A voice that made Bucky tense, Steve and Sam sigh and Natasha roll her eyes.

“Of course she promises. You’re in a state of the art compound, surrounded by two super soldiers, a dude who can fly, a couple of master assassins and a hulk… oh and me.”

They all turned and the dark haired man, leaning against the wall in the corner walked forward and offered his hand to Georgia.

“Hi. Tony Stark. Pleasure’s all yours.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh Tony Stark just makes everything better.   
> So, the avengers have sworn to find Bucky and Georgia's daughter.   
> If she's even alive.  
> Trust me I can be cruel, I may have already killed her, you neeevvveeerrr knooow (insert evil chuckle here).   
> I know I havent fully built Georgia as a character yet but more of her personality will show through as she works through her trauma and reveals more of her, just give me time dudes.   
> Let me know what you think.   
> More soon.  
> Geronimo xx

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so.  
> 1\. I love Bucky Barnes  
> 2\. I will never forgive the mcu for not including the Bucky/natasha relationship.  
> 3\. BUCKY BARNES IS NOT A FREAKING VILLAIN  
> I update as much as I can.  
> This was inspired by a video edit I saw on Youtube and you should check it out, just search "Bucky Barnes and Eleven father/daughter"  
> I love to get feedback about what you like, what can improve and what you want to see!  
> Keep reading my nerds. 
> 
> Geronimo xx


End file.
